Posts Tagged ‘lessons’

three years ago today (part two of the love story).

Tuesday, July 27th, 2010

{disclaimer: anniversary mushiness lies ahead….}

Three years ago today, I put on a pretty dress and promised to love my best friend forever. I promised to bring joy into his life, and he promised to cherish every minute of every day as my husband. We agreed I would do the laundry, and he would take out the trash.

Marriage often feels like one big lesson in which we both become more aware of our strengths and weaknesses. Or, if you’re like me, you become more aware of his strengths and more aware of your weaknesses.

I’ve learned a lot in our third year of marriage, starting with the fact that my husband is much more selfless than I will ever be. I recently re-read our wedding vows, and could not believe how well Brett held up his part of the bargain. On our wedding day, he assured me: “I promise to place as much importance on your goals as I do my own and I promise to do everything that I can do to help you achieve them.”

If you haven’t met my husband, you should know that he is the epitome of supportive. If I came home one day and told him I wanted to become an astronaut, he would begin researching NASA training programs immediately.

Okay, probably not. But you get the idea.

He’s the one who told me to quit the job I hated, when I didn’t have a solid replacement lined up. The one who listened to me cry over a broken friendship for months, when I knew he was sick of hearing about it. The one who reminds me every single day that I can accomplish everything and anything I set my mind to. He’s the one who believes in me, when I don’t believe in myself.

Yep, he’s the one. The perfect one for me.

He’s not perfect, and we all know I’m far from it. Truth be told, our marriage isn’t perfect either. We fight and yell and scream sometimes. But at the end of the day, it makes us stronger. It teaches us patience. It teaches us how to love each other better.

As Brett so eloquently stated tonight at dinner: “Our marriage is like a fine wine….it keeps getting better with every passing year.” I couldn’t have said it better myself.

So, cheers to our first three years of marriage! May we continue to laugh until we cry, scream until we laugh, and learn how to love each other better. I cannot wait to see what the next three years bring. Maybe one of these, perhaps? (No promises Mom.)

(I love you, B.)

23 lessons.

Wednesday, March 17th, 2010

With my 24th birthday rapidly approaching, I cannot help but reflect on the life lessons 23 has brought me. Another year older, another year wiser, right? While I am sad to say goodbye to 23, I am equally excited to see what my 24th year on this earth has in store for me. And no, I am not talking about babies (sorry future Grandmas)

Without further adieu, here are 23 things I learned (about myself and beyond) while I was 23:

1. It is perfectly acceptable to have cereal for dinner when you’re too tired to cook. Nobody has to know, and it won’t kill you.

2. My house will never be as clean as I want it to be for more than one day, and I should probably stop trying to change that.

3. I am addicted to frozen yogurt. This was mere speculation for a while, but upon the establishment of a frozen yogurt joint within 3 miles from my house, it can now be considered fact.

4. Impatience is part of my DNA, and I seriously need to work on it.

5. Painting (walls) is a lot harder than it looks. It is also more expensive and time-consuming than people make it out to be.

6. Just because you feel something doesn’t make it true.

7. Washing your hair is overrated. Also overrated? Sleep.

8. The bond that forms between friends who pray for each other is not easily broken.

9. I complain way more than I should—I need to work on that as well.

10. Most of the beauty in this world goes unnoticed, but an obsession with photography can sometimes resolve that.

11. God will continue to test me, but he will never give me more than I can handle.

12. To be married to your best friend is one of the greatest gifts of life, and is not something you should take for granted.

13. I was meant to write. Jobs will come and go, but if I can write something for someone (even just myself), I’ll be okay.

14. Negativity does not belong in my life, nor do the friends or jobs who force it upon me.

15. Sometimes you have to say no.

16. I might need to check myself into computer rehab soon. Anyone else?

17. I absolutely love Sacramento (yes, I officially learned this while I was 23).

18. Friendship requires mutual effort between two people. It’s a give and take; not a give or take.

19. Words are useless without the actions to support them.

20. When I don’t succeed, I end up learning something—and that in itself, is valuable.

21. Good things come to those who wait. I suspect even better things come to those who wait patiently, but I wouldn’t know anything about that (see #4).

22. I am not ready to have a baby. But, I love all of my friends who are ready, and would like to thank them in advance for letting me enjoy their miracle(s) while I wait.

23. People change. Sometimes for the good, and other times not. Either way, it’s a part of life and the sooner I accept that, the better.

What did you learn when you were my age?

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lessons in marriage

Wednesday, July 15th, 2009

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Lately I feel as though every time I turn around, there is a news story or article printed about how to make your marriage last.  There are all kinds of different studies out there, each one insisting they have the answers.  From your age and weight to how much money you have, factors in every category of life seem to play a role in whether or not a couple will get divorced.  I hate statistics like that and it deeply saddens me that almost 60% of marriages end in divorce.

With my two year wedding anniversary rapidly approaching (July 27th), I have been thinking a lot about what I have learned during my first two years of marriage.  Clearly I don’t have everything figured out and probably never will, but at the end of the day, I love my husband with all my heart and consider myself incredibly blessed to have him in my life.  He’s my very best friend and I have no idea what I would do without him.  After two years of marriage, here are just a few of the lessons I have learned:

1. For every three chick flicks your husband sees with you, you need to see one action testosterone-filled movie with him.

2. It’s important to be open-minded and try new things together.

3. A simple “thank you” goes a LONG way.

4. Start and end every day with a kiss.

5. Never underestimate the importance of sitting down for dinner together to discuss your days.

6. Sometimes listening is more important than giving feedback.

7. Lunches packed with love notes are always better than those without.

8. The silent treatment never solves anything.

9. The sharing of the closet should consist of 2/3 belonging to the wife and 1/3 belonging to the husband.

10. In regards to the shoe rack, 7/8 of the space should belong to the wife and 1/8 to the husband.

11. No matter what kind of budget you are on or how busy you are, there is ALWAYS time and money for a date night.

12. Compliments are always welcome and always appreciated.

13. Whoever makes dinner doesn’t have to do the dishes.

14. Compromises are necessary.

15. Sometimes, you need to get dressed up for each other.

16. Cleaning the house is a team effort.

17. Respect each other’s “down time”.

18. It doesn’t need to be a holiday to plan a surprise or buy a gift for each other.

19. Only bring your husband shopping if there is a “husband chair” for him to sit on while you’re in the dressing room.

20. Sometimes….the laundry can wait.

As I prepare to enter into my third year of marriage to the most amazing husband on the planet, I vow to: be more patient, be a better listener, be more supportive, pray for Brett more, let the little things go, and try to do one nice thing for Brett every single day.

Happy two year anniversary Brett– thank you for being you and for making me want to be a better me.  I love you.

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