on breastfeeding and being human.

where my heart residesIt’s morning and cold and our breaths are in sync, two of his for every one of mine, in and out with the rhythm of the sound of the heater, set to 70 this time of year because I refuse to bundle him up in extra layers inside the house.

My toes are tucked snugly under the burnt orange duvet cover, my back against the headboard, the lights off. My eyes are half-closed, as are his, and he eats slowly, blissfully, freely. We are skin to skin and it’s the time of day that I feel most connected to this little soul that once grew inside my belly.

We are both quiet and content and he needs me and I need him and together we are human.

And I can’t stop thinking of the amazing-ness of it, the miracle of it, that my body grew him and now sustains him. I can’t stop thinking of God’s goodness and perfect, intricate design for motherhood. I am in complete awe of what my body has done and continues to do, this life giving life.

And despite the first two painful weeks, the ugly nursing bras, the pumping, and the fact that I can’t be away from him for too long, this life giving life is worth all of it.

Because he needs me and I need him and together, breastfeeding, we are human.

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11 Responses to on breastfeeding and being human.

  1. Lacy says:

    I love this post. Thank you for this sweet reminder. My daughter Ingrid is nearing 10 months old and nursing has been the best thing for the both of us. Love to you!
    Lacy´s last blog post ..Remembering Now: 9 months and 26 months

  2. Lesley says:

    Reminds me how excited I am to do it again. 🙂 It is a miracle, especially those early morning feeds.
    Lesley´s last blog post ..Thursday Thoughts: Doing something close to nothing

  3. Danielle says:

    Gorgeous my friend, truly gorgeous!

  4. Sarabell says:

    So beautiful! I am so nervous and excited about breastfeeding soon!
    Sarabell´s last blog post ..Check Out This Place 36

  5. Anne says:

    Your words here are completely beautiful. I am excited to experience this for myself soon!

  6. Alli Moore says:

    Beautiful Ashlee! Actually looking forward to this when I have a baby. It really is amazing what our bodies are capable of.

  7. Brit says:

    This is absolutely beautiful.

  8. caprice says:

    This is such a sweet post! speaking of nursing…would you ever consider blogging about nursing clothing favorites?

  9. Brittany says:

    This is beautiful! I feel the same way about my little 5 month old man. It’s such a miracle and so amazing!

  10. viktorija says:

    my husband and i are trying to get pregnant. this post made my heart ache–in a very good way. 😉 i’ve worried before about those ugly nursing bras and being attached to a baby for so many months and what would happen to my breasts…but your post was the perfect antidote for those worries.

  11. Josie says:

    I absolutely love breastfeeding and holding my baby close so this post really resonates with me. We hear so often about the struggles associate with breastfeeding (and yes.. there are many) but it’s refreshing to hear about the joys too. My baby is almost 3months and I get sad at the thought of not breastfeeding.

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