Remember when you were young younger and timeouts were the bane of your existence? There was no worse source of misery than being forced to sit in your room, corner, chair, insert awkward timeout location here_______.
Tick. Tock.
Ten minutes was eternity when you were on timeout. No matter what kind of mindless game you attempted to create in your head, the permission to play could not come soon enough.
Today? I would kill for a timeout. A reason to take a moment for myself. An excuse to decline an invitation. An explanation for my occasional selfishness.
Yet when I really think about it, there’s nothing stopping me from taking a timeout. I would just have to put myself there. I would need to punish (or, dare I say reward?) myself with a designated allotment of time to spend alone. Of course, real timeouts stem from bad behavior. So, what have I done wrong?
Well, where do I start exactly? I’ve been unintentionally killing my spirit, for starters. I’ve been filling up my calendar with all sorts of exciting events and responsibilities. You know, the stuff that makes a person feel important, needed, and wanted. In doing so, I have inadvertently forgotten about myself. I have eaten nothing but grease for the past thirty days, while simultaneously allowing dust to collect on my running shoes. I have spent more time in front of my computer than in front of books, and more time yawning than smiling.
Guilty. As. Charged. For my punishment, I hereby deem the month of September as my timeout. That’s right folks—thirty whole days. I deserve it. I would like to apologize in advance to all my friends and colleagues. I might not be able to make your play date, or help you sell lemonade. I might have to miss a meeting (or two), and please don’t hate me if I ask for a rain check.
I was always taught that a timeout’s purpose was to give you time to think. Time to dwell on what you had done wrong, and why your behavior was unacceptable.
I have every intention of doing just that.
Every intention of recognizing my limits, and acknowledging the fact that I am not superwoman. Of learning (yes, again) how to say no, and how to prioritize better. Of giving up things that I want to do, but know that I simply cannot do.
And in doing so, I will remember how to take care of myself. I will remember how to make healthy home-cooked meals, and how to run without stopping. I will remember how to read for hours on end, paint my nails, and sit on my husband’s lap while we chat about our days. I will remember what it’s like to find inspiration in the day-to-day beauty of this earth, and how good it feels to put pen to paper.
I will make this the best damn timeout I have ever been given.
Permission to play will resume October 1st.
Tick. Tock.
My parents didn’t do the time-out system, but I definitely think time out as an adult is reward, not punishment. You don’t need an “excuse” for time to yourself! It’s not selfish to decline an invitation or sit out on a responsibility…better let them know beforehand than be burnt out later. Congrats to you for setting aside a month…does that mean no lunch dates either? Better squeeze me into August!
Angeline´s last [type] ..Underneath it all
Oh, and I am really good at crafting “no” responses, if you ever need help or encouragement
I’m nice about it, too. I sat out from going to weddings this entire year after last year’s craziness.
Angeline´s last [type] ..Underneath it all
Good for you girlfriend. I have been saying *no* a lot more lately too and although I feel a bit guilty about it at first, its better than the stress that comes along with always rushing to and from the next thing on my calendar. I do, however, hope Stitch Swap is not part of the time out lol.
Liz´s last [type] ..Twenty-five
@Angeline: lunch dates are not part of the timeout. A girl’s gotta EAT!
@Liz: Stitch Swap is the one approved timeout activity. You know I wouldn’t miss out on free clothes and Go Girls.
This entry is SOOO relatable! I am guilty of booking myself up MONTHS in advance, every weekend, every night after work, you name it – im booked! I have also just reached my own breaking point. I will join you in having September be my TIME OUT month!! Great idea! xoxo
If adult timeout means taking some time for yourself then I think I’ve been on timeout since about November of 1999 (when I became an adult – by this society’s definition). As I know you can attest to I’m not much for having plans. I’m the quintessential home-body.
Maybe in September I’ll take myself off of timeout and plan some exciting adventures for you and I. Don’t worry, you can say “no”.
@Shayna let’s plan a whole day to watch SATC re-runs in our pjs. That sounds like a perfectly acceptable timeout plan, yes?
@B I would never say “no” to you. Well, maybe sometimes
Good for you, enjoy the time and just . . . be.
Monica´s last [type] ..I Had To Share!
good for you, dear! we all need time-outs… and giving ourselves permission to do so is a wonderful thing. i hope it’s a beautiful, rewarding, fulfilling month for you.
<3
kelly ann´s last [type] ..dailies- yum
well said! sometimes i feel like i’m not being sociable enough or nice enough or whatever enough if i say no, but damnit sometimes i really need time completely by myself. it’s amazing how rejuvenated you feel when you’re not apart of anyone else’s schedule, even for just a single day.
iris ashley´s last [type] ..just breath
lovely post.
I can totally relate and I’ve been commenting to anyone and everyone how I absolutely need a vacation. I think everyone deserves some time to think. It helps put everything into perspective.
Dee´s last [type] ..Turn the music down
Pingback: number 4. | Where My Heart Resides
After reading this wonderful post, I’ve decided that I also need a time out! I am also an overcommiter, and I find that it does no one good in the end. If I spread myself too thin, I can’t do a good job of what I’ve committed to do. So why not devote time to just one or two things I really love and do those things well, vs. doing many things with half a heart? Makes total sense.
Pingback: Time Out « SRSLYLIZ.COM
thats a wonderful realization and I think its amazing that you are committing a month to rest for yourself. I hope that this will instill some healthy habits for you to fall back on when you are done. Can’t wait to read how the experience went for you.
Thanks Olga! I need it badly. Will be sure to post an update when I finish
Pingback: the one where my jeans no longer fit. | Where My Heart Resides
Pingback: the great timeout: one part fail, one part success. | Where My Heart Resides
Pingback: wednesdays are for gratitude – 10.20.10 | That Loud Girl
I can’t seem to be able to reach this page from my iphone!